Januari 22, 2011

Aku dah kata. Aku nak mati dulu. Kau tak bagi.


" Kau pegi balik ruma lah bagus. Sakit mata je kau kat sini! "

I may always say bad things behind your back. I do things that are defi-fucking-nitely out of your will. I go to places without your permission and I've said many things that might have hurt you a lot. But believe me mom, I could never ask for any other mother than you. You're definitely the best I will ever have and I really love you so much. Even I am not so great in expressing it.

Bu, tak nampak ke lagi berapa byk adik sayang ibu? Bangun pagi2, mandi sejuk2, pegi kedai tolong ibu sampai tgh hari. Even adik sakit, adik diam jeh, still tolong jugak. Kalau dulu time sekolah, pon kalau ibu minta tolong adik, adik tolong. Time exam, bawa buku p kedai. Bawa je, tak belajar pun. Even tak sempat pon nak belajar. Ibu try suruh anak ibu yg ke-3 tuh, dia nak? Mati hidup balik, pon belum tentu dia sanggup. Adik tahu adik tak bagus mcm anak ibu yg lain. "Kenapa kau tak mcm kakak ah?" Ibu selalu cakap ayat ni. Kadang-kadang sampai tak boleh tahan likuit yg keluar kat mata adik ni bu. Adik taknak tunjuk. Nanti kena marah. Bu, tak lame jeh lagi. Adik keluar dari rumah ni. I'll make my own steps out there. I promise, I'll leave you and make you proud of me. Sikit jeh lagi time tu sampai. Sabar sikit, please.
I'll come back with a new home. Ibu nak rumah besar kan. Nanti kita beli, okay? Insyallah.

Exhausted. Im all gone. Die *kesat likuit meleleh kat mata*

2 ulasan:

Liyana Sharia berkata...

aku paham perasaan kauu :) chill la okay . dia tak sedar lagi tu . one day bila dia sedar baru dia tau :)

Lulu Zulkifli berkata...

Okay thanks. Aku rasa dlm dunia ni, only kau dgn aku, we have the same heart.